That Empath Feeling....

Have you ever had days where you know you should be feeling upbeat but for some reason you feel like something is draining your energy? I woke up feeling like that today, for no apparent reason at all.

I had a fantastic day yesterday at my second photoshoot, in East London, feeling like a queen and briming with confidence. It was a gorgeous day, so after my shoot I went for a walk, got my nails done and decided to go and have some lunch and read my book. It was a totally chilled, self-love kind of day. I got the train home later, ran myself the most decadent bath I could muster (candles, bath salts, the lot!) and had a lovely, early night. HOW AMAZING!

Today however, I woke up, got myself and Jack a coffee (in bed, our Sunday ritual), thinking about how I am going to finish my book and then cook a roast dinner this afternoon; and started to feel really drained. An hour later, whilst having my 3rd cup of piping hot ground coffee and finishing a chapter in my book, I said it out loud. Something is draining my energy. Making me feel anxious and not so great about myself. You know that knot in your gut, that you get sometimes when you feel like something is off? It was like that.

So, me being me, I started a mental checklist of things that I hadn't done or needed doing.

Nothing on there stood out as being the cause of my energy-vat. How perplexing! What the H could it be? Maybe it is that "Sunday-itis" feeling, the trepidation of knowing tomorrow is back to work. Again, I have a good day planned plus choir in the evening, so it isn't that. Hmmm....curiouser and curiouser.

Then it hit me, as an Empath, I take on external feelings and emotions as my own. Over the past few weeks as things have been a bit up-and-down personally, I think that I have been absorbing & burying outside energies & emotions, that are not my own to take on. This has now become an anchor for my own vibes and is affecting my energy.

It is tricky, as an Empath not let outside influences and energies have an impact on yourself and to separate what is yours to deal with and what is not. I admit, I am terrible at it. Always have been.

I am the very first to say that I will "die in a ditch for my people", I will literally go to war for anyone of my "circle". Along with that though, comes taking on causes and issues that are not my own to take on. Things that are not my crosses to bear, and this causes me to get bogged down sometimes and taints my world view.

Having realised that this has been the cause of my "aura-dent" today, I closed my eyes and said the following over and over for several minutes:

"This is not MY issue, this is not MY problem and this is not MY cross to bear. Let it go. Let it fall like water off a duck's back. Not my concern, not MY aura".

I know it sounds all "witchy-poo" and stuff, but honestly, it actually worked! It helped refocus my mind on the reality, which is, I am having an awesome "green" day at home and have had a great weekend. I went back over the things that I am grateful for (see previous post) and literally within 20mins, I felt lighter, sharper and freer.

Today I am thankful for:

1) The sun is shining, the air is clean, and I have food in my belly

2) I have 2 furbabies who seem to want to give me all the kisses in the world today, unprovoked!

3) I have the ability to read a book uninterrupted

4) My husband is chilling out, playing playstation and is happy doing his own thing with a smile on his face

Key take aways for the Empath's out there:

a) Remember that self care and self love is like filling your tank with petrol. Don't expect to be able to function for others with an empty tank. You need to DO YOU FIRST, before you can give of yourself to others.

b) Take time out and step back from everything; and not take on crosses that are not yours to bear. It is one thing to be that person for someone, it is another to do it to the detriment of your own self. LET GO of anything that is not yours. It will only dim your light.

c) INDULGE IN THE CREATIVE/EXPRESSIVE aspects of your personality as the release for all of the negativity. Sing, paint, write, dance, dress up, cook, take photos - whatever it is that you fancy, do it and do not feel guilty about indulging in it. It is crucial for your "inner tank" per above.

With love, respect and big ol' hugs. Take care of yourself!

TCG